Ska-douche

So I've been really digging my jogs lately. Maybe it's something in the air, but they've just felt extra satisfying lately. The other day however, about a mile and a half in....I turfed it.

So all of a sudden, I'm on the sidewalk and kind of unsure how to recover from such an incident...and is it possible to maintain any dignity or cool? I just rolled over, sat up, got in the straddles and...acted like I was stretching. ??? haha I realized right after I started doing it that NOBODY watching the incident would have ever believed that what I just did was planned and I just wanted to stretch mid-run. I just got up and kept running. These cute old guys on their porch said, "Miss, are you hurt?". Oh please don't be so sweet to me or I'll probably cry. Embarrassment + genuine kindness = me tearing right on up. It's all good in the hood. I was pleased with the lil' bruise--some cool shades of purple. I just wish I had a cool story with it. Who's going to be impressed with, "Oh yeah this? I just fell on my face while lifting my legs one at a time at a rapid pace." Yeah...definite loss of cool points I feel.

The latest haps

• You know that little compartment between the drivers seat and that of the passenger? Yes, well I opened it yesterday and found a Redbox flick. I don't know how long it has been in there. Part of me wanted to laugh, the other part (the one that was thinking of my bank account) wanted to throw up. haha Good one Mal.
• I currently have been listening to a lot of David Archuletta. Who's a spaz? Yup, pick me. Especially today, for some reason I was just being rubbed the right way by his tunes and therefore they were the obvious choice on my Logan de-stressifying drive.
• My jog yesterday was all I ever wanted. It was really nice. There's something so satisfying about running to me. I love it. I need new shoes though. I've had my current ones for a year and a half (which I don't know if that's a long or short about of time) but they have a hole in the bottom going right through. Hmm...not a problem as long as there aren't puddles right?
• I had a U.S. History test on Friday and er...it didn't go fantastically, I fear. It almost made me feel unpatriotic. Who am I to not be super knowledgeable about my homeland?
• So I've been a wee bit of a girl lately...which I have found annoying...and I've been searching for some closure from a certain lad. I don't understand how to get it. I kind of just want to drop an a-bomb on my feelings and have them go away. I've talked to my fav roomies, googled it, and have just decided that closure is at the top of my list of things that Ol' Saint Nick can bring me for Christmas.
• My first day of teaching Gospel Doctrine was today. It probably takes me more time than the average Joe to study up and feel confident with it, but I loved teaching today. How funny that I've been avoiding this calling for years and it turns out to be one that I really enjoy. Outside of my comfort zone and yet, I like it there. haha It was fun. It's going to take a lot of work, but thus far it's been worth it.

Well I am going to sleep because I have a test tomorrow. But perhaps later this week I'll post about an "alliance" that we're forming. It's a hilarious plan we've come up with and I'm stoked for it to come about. Til then!

Nachooooo

"Get that corn outta my face!" haha So we had some peeps over for a Nacho Libre party last night. It was great. We had corn on a stick, played some card games and watched the film while passing around chips and salsa. Simple, fun, themed hilarity.

Roomate pic. Kim, me, Amy, and Brianne. I have positive feelings for one and all. haha

Paint Dance

Today was grand for so many reasons. First of all, I have found employment!! Can I get a woot woot?!? I will be working at the Fun Park. It's kind of a cool story how it all played out but I have a job! I will have some sort of income and another social outlet. Love, love, love.

Also, how lovely was it of USU to have a dance the same night?! There was a glow-in-the-dark paint dance on campus which was ridiculously fun. Tons more people came this year than last year. Essentially, there's a DJ, lots of music-some of which is naturally lame, but they have big tubes at the front spraying glow-in-the-dark paint on everybody. And then they had black lights shining out into all of us so that none of it went unnoticed. It looked super cool and was just so fun to let loose and shake it like a wet border collie. It was pretty rad. One of my roomies came and one of bestest pals Kori came. A lot of the paint you can't actually see in the picture because it seems faint and pastelly in the light. But we got paint splattered all over us, danced our little hearts out, and are now ready for bed. This is one of those days that I really love this phase of my life. I can go out and dance, play, laugh my face off, and have the best of times with my friends and get just enough sleep before my two institute classes tomorrow morning. Sometimes I feel like good days get overlooked. So let it be known: Good day today. :)

Hilarious French Man + Gymnastics Prank = Hilarity

Tonight was fabulous. We went to the USU vs BYU hockey game. It was brilliant. Especially since the only thing I know about the sport, I have learned from the Mighty Ducks triology. Not joking. I kept waiting/hoping they'd break into the "Flying V".

We came home and watched some hilarious vids. I just have a deep appreciation for people who make their own fun. Therefore, a man like Remi Gaillard does nothing but make me laugh. He's nuts but absolutely hilarious. His pranks are always one of a kind and usually involve some sort of over-the-top costume. He's hilarious. He makes everything awkward. And all things awkward please me. haha So here's a wee taste:



We later had some people over for cookies and ice cream and just talked and laughed for a while. I have discovered that humor is a definite must for me. I've dated some really sweet guys that...are just kind of boring. The friends that came over tonight are just super fun and...the opposite of boring in every way. I love that. I enjoy finding joy and humor in my life and I just genuinely appreciate the people that make those things easy to notice.

I then stayed up with two of my roomies until...oh...late. I ADORE my roommates. We just have so much fun together and get along like a charm. I lucked out big time. I totally brought my camera with me this evening in hopes of taking pics. Yeah, that didn't happen. :( There are more parties and good times to be had. We'll have to remember to make a passerby capture them in digital form for us. Til then, enjoy Remi and all of his hilarity. :)

More male peculiarities here in Blowgan...

There's a guy in one of the classes for my major. Initial observations: He's quiet, tall, has a kind of low monotone voice, he's really chill, I know he plays the guitar, from Virginia, seems like he could be pretty cool. I dunno, I tend to give everyone the benefit of the doubt. So last weekend we hung out A LOT. Friday from 7:30-2:00a.m. It was lengthy. Then Saturday he wanted to meet up with us at the game. He came and sat by me from half-time to the end and...he didn't stop talking. haha

Him: "Did you see the Womens soccer game--USA vs. Brazil?"

Me: "Nope."

Him: "Aw, man I cannot believe you missed out on that match. Let me tell you what happened."

He then proceeds a 20 minute play-by-play of what happened with that match. Call me crazy, but I feel like if that match was important to me, I would have seen it. The fact that I missed it, shows that it is really not high on my priority list. Just saying. You could assume that and be correct.

He told me that one of the girls was wearing a pink sports bra under her shirt. He chuckles. "She's such a girl."

Later highlights of the evening include him telling me the play-by-plays of EVERY injury he's ever obtained from skate boarding. "Yeah, I've had like a bunch of concussions. My mom never knew about any of them. Well...technically they were just self-diagnosed." Nice.

Chatterbox. He was talking the whole last half of the game. I MAYBE said five words. And he ignored all of them, ploughing through his stories that he was determined to tell. The game finally ended and we were going to go with a group of friends to get a pizza. He suggested that afterwards we could watch a movie at his house. How un-Christlike of me is it that I honestly thought, "As long as there won't be talking, I'm in." haha

On our way to the car he says, "So you know how one of the main bonuses to getting married is sex right?"

Me: (Speechless. I am comfortable talking about this subject with certain people, but sportsy ramblekins is not one of them. I've known him for 2.5 days and WHY is he bringing this up?!)

Him: Well in my mission all of us elders would talk about the honeymoon at night and how it was going to be.

Me: (Continued silence. Is this guy for real?)

Him: So I got this companion that hadn't been out very long and our first night together, I brought it up and he was like, "what?!". (chuckle chuckle chuckle)

Me: Yes, I imagine that would have been quite the shock for him. He thought he was signing up for 2 years of teaching the gospel and talking to people about Jesus. So naturally you throwing in that subject matter would make him uncomfortable.

SUNDAY

I had to go early to church to get a calling. When I finished meeting with the bishopric member, I had like a half hour before church started. Perfect, I thought, I'll just stay here and read my scriptures in the meantime. Perfect mental preparation.

This very nice guy came like 20 minutes later and asked if he could sit by me. We made small talk for a bit. The usual-what's your major? Where are you from? etc. Well at one point he says to me, "I feel like I know everything about you."

I just laughed and said, "Oh, well, there's a little more to me than that. Just a little."

He laughed then got all serious and said, "Well I am really interested in getting to know you better."

My roommate sitting on the other side of me started laughing. Nice. Umm...."Well maybe we can work that out." was all I could think of to say. I just kept hoping that he wasn't going to ask me out before sacrament meeting. I'm just not in the mental state to flirt or ward off flirting at the moment. We'll see what happens with that. Always funny moments here in Blowgan. Mal

John Andreas Widtsoe

I have two institute classes. I love them both. One of them has been talking about goal-setting this week. It's the EXACT lesson that I've been needing. I've kind of felt like I've been in a progressional rut. And for a while now I've known that I needed to take some time to reflect and set goals. So today I started reading ahead in the manual and found a really cool story about a man named John Andreas Widtsoe. He wrote the following lines on some lined paper:

"I realize that happiness in old age consists of reviewing a life devoid from great sins; and gratification of noble desires manfully carried out..."

He wrote out 17 resolutions. He ended up attending Harvard University and served in the quorum of the twelve apostles. I read over his 17 resolutions in complete awe of this mans pure desires, awareness of the value of time, and resolution to accomplish and do good starting with the details. I won't write all of them out for you but here are some of my favorites of his resolutions:

1st. That religion, the science of sciences, be made my chief concernment throughout life.

2nd. That I will daily pray to God in secret.

3rd. That I will daily reflect upon God and his attributes and try to become like Him.

4th. That I will receive Light, Wisdom, or Knowledge, wherever or however it may be offered.

6th. That I never lose one moment of time but improve it.

7th. That I maintain strict temperance in eating and drinking.

8th. That I never do anything that I would not do were it the last hour of my life.

10th. That in any narrations I speak nothing but the pure and simple verity.

14th. That I seek to overcome the habit of being quick tempered, loud speaking, impatient motions or whatever might offend my fellowmen and hurt me.

16th. That I complete every task which I begin; also that I carefully consider my purpose and its results before taking upon me any duty.

17th. That I always remember that the men and women I meet are my brothers and sisters and that I look to the beam in my own eye before attempting to remove the mote in my fellow's eye.

Wow. I really left my apartment so I could think and ponder on who I want to be. It really was so satisfying and just made my whole day better when I took some honest time to evaluate what I'm doing, things I want to change, and the things I want to do. Is this quote by Marianne Williamson overused? Because I still love it every time:

"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.

Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.

It is our light not our darkness that most frightens us.

We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented and fabulous?

Actually, who are you not to be?

You are a child of God.

Your playing small does not serve the world.

There's nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you.

We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us.

It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone.

And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same.

As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others."

Isn't that lovely? I just really believe that we all have potential to make a difference in the world and in one anothers lives. But today was a great awakening for me to realize that if I'm going to do great things, I need to start acting like it. I need to use my time wisely. I need to make plans, set goals, have resolutions. Doesn't that sound more decisive than "goal"? I love that his resolutions weren't even anything worldly. These resolutions undoubtedly contributed to his character--which should be what we're ultimately trying to refine right? It just made me refocus the kinds of goals that I've been setting and the vision of who I want to be and how I want to get there. Wow, sorry I've been so seriously lately in my postings. I will have to post something fun next time. Til then, Mal

Judging my own self as I'm writing this.

So...I have this problem. The other day I was sick of doing a lame reading assignment so I decided to do something that I do sometimes--Look at pictures of where I've been, want to go, people that I want to meet/help, etc. If only this type of activity were fulfilling instead of blatantly pathetic. Just wait. It gets worse.

Not only do I spend my time looking through pictures of my past and googling pictures of possible futures, but it causes...some sort of emotional reaction that is entirely involuntary. My throat starts to tighten up, my eyes start to get moist, and there is some sort of rush in my chest that seems to trigger and encourage the first two. So...what is THAT about?! I feel like an alien experiencing emotion for the first time. It just comes over me...when I look at photographs mind you. I feel silly even trying to explain it.

I didn't used to be this way. I really didn't. I blame many of my problems on my three month excursion the nauseatingly not overrated Paris, France though lets be serious, a year and a half in Italy is certainly a contributing factor. I guess it could be because it's been in my travels out of the country where I've really learned and felt things that I'd never felt/understood before. Seeing possibilities, experiencing curiosity, recognizing previously undiscovered potential, and the rush of feeling like there's no place else you'd rather be--and more than that, that you feel like you fit there.

For instance, it happens EVERY time I look at pictures of children in Africa. Call me an emotional wreck, but I see their beautiful faces and I just want to hold them. I want them to feel loved. I feel like I already love them and we don't even know each other. I want to play with them. I want to laugh with them. I want to dance with them. In my mind, as I'm irrationally fantasizing about a possible excursion to Africa, I'm sure the experience would fill me with immense joy and love. And yet I WOULD cry like an infant the day I'd have to leave. I get easily attached I suppose. I like people without them having to try to win me over. Therefore, a few pictures of darling children from a continent that I have been longing to go to, and... cue the emotional wreck.

Naturally Italy and France hold strong emotional ties for me. I've never fallen in love with a male but I have most definitely fallen in love with two lovely countries. It's weird how a place and your experiences there can give something to you. Make you stronger, make you think, make you understand, re-evaluate, feel something you didn't think you could....I don't know if any of this makes sense. I guess I've just been thinking about plans that I have for the future. I know that right now these aren't really options but they will be eventually. I clearly want them bad enough--just ask my body that physically reacts when I see pictures of people that I've never met. (yeah, I realize that I sound silly. Tant pis.) So if I want it that bad, I'll find a way to eventually make it happen.

Can I just close with a couple of quotes from one of my dearest friends-Joseph Johannes. He was in my last area--Rome 3. He's from Ethiopia and he is one of those people that I knew without a doubt I needed to meet. I love him very berry much. Teaching him was incredible because he was both 1. incredibly intelligent and yet 2. remarkably humble. I learned quickly into teaching him that I needed to write down things that he said because they were beautiful in their simplicity.

"You know what, I feel good when I do something for someone else. I wonder if God commands us to give service partly because He knows it'll make us feel good." Isn't that sweet?

"You were made in the image of God. You can do anything." Mmm.

"You were made in the image of God. And God is beautiful."

If these little diddies don't bring happiness, I know few things that will. Love to all. Til my next post!

Un...comfort zone

Missed a call from a phone number of this area code this morning.

They left a message.

Appointment with the bishop.

Natural thought: Calling.

Afterthought: Gospel Doctrine Teacher.

Wincing, pushing the thought from my mind, I think, "R.S. Teacher perhaps." But what keeps coming to my mind? Exactly what I've been trying to avoid for a long time. Gospel Doctrine Teacher.

I go to meet with the Bishopric member. We sit down, small talk, they say they've all been thinking about callings and my name came up several times for a certain calling. Gospel Doctrine Teacher. Thankfully I had it lingering in my head all morning so when he finally said it out loud I was more used to the idea.

I really enjoy teaching. I like preparing, I love when the time actually comes to teach and being able to hear from everybody in the class. But yeah, for some reason I've always had a pansy mentality about Gospel Doctrine Teacher. It has freaked me out and had me under the impression that there's no way I could be further out of my comfort zone. The Bishopric member said, "So how do you feel about it?" haha I said, "Nervous. But if it's what you want me to do then I'm game." haha Yipes. If I call you for advice and stories when I'm preparing for a lesson, just humor me k? Yeah, this is going to put me right on out of my comfort zone. But that's okay. Because there is zero personal growth in the comfort zone. So...this should be fun.

Loving everything about love and charity

I LOVE "The Great Commandment" talk by Elder Joseph B. Wirthlin. One of my favorite missionaries did a training using this talk and it was one of the coolest experiences. There were key points in my mission where I was able to reflect on charity and my need to implement it more fully into my life, the work, and my character. What is it really? How can I get it to seep into every aspect of my life? This talk is one that I read with a constant hum of "Mmm" because it's so delicious to think about. A few favorite thoughts:

• Now, for us, the measure of our love is the measure of the greatness of our souls
• "A man filled with the love of God, is not content with blessing his family alone, but ranges through the whole world, anxious to bless the whole human race." Joseph Smith
• Love is the beginning, the middle, and the end of the pathway of discipleship. It comforts, counsels, cures, and consoles.
• Sometimes the greatest love is not found in the dramatic scenes that poets and writers immortalize. Often, the greatest manifestations of love are the simple acts of kindness and caring we extend to those we meet along the path of life.
• We see ourselves in terms of yesterday and today. Our Heavenly Father sees us in terms of forever. Although we might settle for less, Heavenly Father won't, for He sees us as the glorious beings we are capable of becoming.
• The greater the measure of our love, the greater is our joy. In the end, the development of such love is the true measure of success in life.
• Love is the greatest of all the commandments-all others hang upon it. It is our focus as followers of the living Christ. It is the one trait that, if developed, will most improve our lives.
• Because He loves us, He has provided prophets and apostles to guide us in our time. He has given us the Holy Ghost, who teaches, comforts, and inspires. He has given us His scriptures. And I am grateful beyond description that He has given to each of us a heart capable of experiencing the pure love of Christ.

I just love this talk. I love love. I want to be better at it--more effective. Because clearly, it's impacts are huge. It just makes me want to take the fellows advice from the Festival of Colors. "Everybody, hug 10 strangers!" haha I think a lot about this. How many people go to bed at night feeling overloved?? Feeling exhausted because everyone cares too much about them? Loving people isn't going to hurt anything...but just make everyones lives better. Random post. I was just thinking about how much I love this talk and wanted to write about it for a sec. The end.

Relationship status via football analogy

I have two institute classes today. I love them both a great deal. Today one of my teachers had us all stand and introduce ourselves--the usual--name, hometown, major, where you served, etc. EXCEPT this teacher thought of a creative way of sharing our relationship status--football analogy. No joke.

Punt--dating a lot but no one special

Fumble--Just got out of a relationship

Benchwarming (Put me in coach)--not dating anyone at the moment

Touchdown--engaged

1st and down--dating someone

That was a new thing for the day. I'm...punting and benchwarming?? I dunno. But my name's Mallory, I'm a Sociology major, I served in Rome, Italy, and I plink around on the mandolin.

How To Save a Life

Today I donated blood for the very first time. I've always wanted to donate blood but am knowingly too much of a pansy to give it a fair attempt. So today my roommate asked me if I'd join her in saving someones life through this campus activity.

The guy was pretty nice. The needle was bigger than expected. The bag filled up faster than I'd imagined. And I wasn't as queasy as Jack from While You Were Sleeping. It really wasn't as bad as I'd thought and I am actually looking forward to doing it again. Yep...nerd. Best of times.